How You Doin’ Blondie?


This Is Why…
July 7, 2008, 10:45 pm
Filed under: Fail, Life, New Jersey | Tags: , ,

…regardless of your political affiliation, you should always be Pro-Choice.

Hell, I miss Virginia.



The Man Next Door

What is he not understanding? Do I have to literally say to him “I find you very attractive, please ask me out on a date so we can explore this relationship further”? I’ve dropped so many hints, OBVIOUS hints, so many, obvious, hints in fact that I can’t in good conscience believe that they’re flying over his head. He said that he couldn’t believe I was actually interested in him, maybe that’s what’s setting him back. I want to just grab him by the shoulders and scream “BELIEVE IT! I’m 24 and you’re 41 AND I DON’T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH IT! I am a tall blonde TKO and I WANT YOU! DEAL WITH IT!” Is it really that difficult to process? He isn’t the doormat type, so I know he couldn’t possibly be waiting for me to make the first move. Plus, he’s old enough to belong to the generation that privately abhors the overly assertive female anyway, so if he thought I was the type to invite HIM on a date, I doubt very seriously we’d have even made it this far in our relationship. You know what the funny thing is though (and by funny, of course I mean bitterly/tragically ironic), he said his initial intention was to set me up with one of his buddies at the firehouse, Keith. In retrospect, I thought it was kind of odd that every time he talked about getting together at a bar sometime, he always managed to work in how “Keith and all the guys” would be there. Like I knew who he was talking about or something. Um, hello, brand-new to the neighborhood (not to mention the STATE), do you THINK I know who Keith is? Do you think I care? It’s not Keith’s house I’m trying to get invited back to now, is it? He said he thought I’d be good for Keith because he figured I was too young for him, but what he really meant was all he ever saw me in were my work-out clothes, we always ran into each other while I was out walking my dog. He said he realized I wasn’t “right” for Keith about 2 minutes after I walked into the bar to meet him that night. Yeah, no kidding, 2 minutes huh? And you know why that is? Because 2 minutes is how long it took is eyes to come back into focus after he saw me. And he kept touching me, lightly nudging my leg or my arm under the pretense of getting my attention, when really he knew my attention was all his from the beginning. And the bar was loud, so he’d lean in really close so he could talk into my ear, and it gave me goosebumps. He has me hooked, and he HAS to know, so why hasn’t he called? I knew not to expect anything until today because he had his kids from Tuesday until Sunday, but Monday and Tuesdays are his nights without kids! So what’s the deal? I texted him and told him I had a good time and told him that I hoped we could do it again sometime. Is that not the PERFECT set-up for a guy to arrange a second date? Do you know what he did? Nothing. Not a single thing. No text back or anything. Well guess what, I don’t like playing games. If he doesn’t make a decision soon, I’m moving on, and it’ll be his loss.

Hey, it’s not bragging if it’s true.