How You Doin’ Blondie?


I Really Don’t Like The Fit Of This Shoe…

Harken back, if ye will, to the days of old when I was kind of half-assed chasing my single neighbor, S…it turns out, things might not have been as dead as I thought they were. I was at the local dive bar with another guy, and we were canoodling (does that word sounds as stupid as I think it does?), and who should walk in and sit on the other side of the bar, but S. himself. I saw him out of the corner of my eye, so I turned to wave or something, but he wouldn’t look up or acknowledge me. So I figured ok, cool, guess I “didn’t see him”. So my guy and I carry on, but I can feel S. just boring holes into me with his stare. Eventually we left, and for some inexplicable reason, I felt like I’d done something really underhanded to S…I dismissed the feeling, until today. Saw S. three times today, in the span of about an hour. I waved and tried to make eye contact all 3 times, he ignored me. The second time I saw him, he was driving past my house while I was sitting on the porch. He waved at the neighbor walking past on the sidewalk, but he didn’t wave at me. He didn’t even turn his head in my direction. The third time I saw him, he was less then 20 yards away from me, watching his dog urinate on a tree. I waved, but he “didn’t see me”. He ignored me. Completely.

Fuck. I’m being taught a lesson.

I feel like an asshole.

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6 Comments so far
Leave a comment

Erm… perhaps you should go talk to him?

Comment by strikebox

Well I would…but I’m too much of a pussy to say “Hey, I was a real douchebag.”

Comment by How You Doin Blondie

Hmm… well, you could always have your mail “accidentally” delivered to his house to force the eventual interaction for when he comes over to give it to you… but, of course, that borders on obsession… and you’d need to be a mastermind to figure such a crafty scheme…

It’s 2 am in England so I shall bid you good night! 🙂

Comment by strikebox

You’re too much of a pussy to say you’re a douchebag???

Comment by Joe

Yes, yes, I know, the irony didn’t hit me until later though

Comment by How You Doin Blondie

And strikebox, my good man, if I sent my mail to his house, it would definetly look like I’d done it on purpose. He lives across the street and then down two houses. “Oh, my! My mail? Really? How strange…oh and look, it’s my new subscription to ‘I’m Sorry I Didn’t Treat Our Brief Tryst As A Relationship Quarterly’! Lucky day!” And so on…Furthermore, my feelings are kind of hurt too 😦

Comment by How You Doin Blondie




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